Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Who really cares?

A guy was arrested for practicing as a vet when he isn't a liscensed vet. My question is who really cares? Why do we bother having so many damn licenses and rules and regulations for every little thing?

Kiss of Life?

I have several questions about this story of a woman giving CPR to a chicken. 1) Weren't you afraid the chicken would bite your tongue off when it woke up? 2) What made you try this in the first place? 3) What do the kids at her son's school call him and his mom? 4) Who would think that CPR would work on fowl? 5) Who makes practice dummies for this type of rescue? 6) Why? 7) Did the story seem kind of cartoony when she said the eyes opened after each blow? I mean I saw in my head a cartoon chicken having its eyes open up with the old school window covering. 8) Do you think any attractive women in Portland would buy the "Want to come back to my place and practice CPR? The life you save may be your chickens" line? That would make me happy in the kind of way that not many things make me so happy.

Your Grandmother Was a Horrible Mother!!!

So everyone and their poodle is up in arms about Britney Spears (Remember her, she was famous before she married a backup dancer with singing asperations and got herself preggers) driving around with her son in her lap. Me? I am not concerned about this in the least. Aside from not caring whether Mr. Federline's child lives to see puberty and has to deal with the schoolkids calling his mom names and being right about what they call her 75% of the time, I guess I just have a sense of perspective on this. I've ridden on an elder's lap unseatbelted as they were driving a car. I am sure my parents were too. I can't go to much further back because I am not sure how old my grandparents were when their parents got a car, but if they had one at the appropriate time, I am sure they would have done so as well.

Well you might try to make the argument that there were no child safety seats back in the day, and I say you forget yourself. They had boxes, ropes and blankets if your safety on a short little ride to the store was so important that failing to take these precausions would give DHS cause to investigate and take action.

Let's face it. We are raising a nation of pussies. We have become so overprotective none of the parenting styles that have been around for centuries are allowed any longer. No spanking if it leaves a bruise. No cookie dough. No short trips with the kids in the car unless you lug around a baby seat. No driving yourself around without a seat belt. No buying anything at the store without a panel to tell you that the box of ho ho's you are buying aren't good for you. It's okay to feed your kids microwaveable shit for 10 years, but don't go out driving for 10 minutes without a seat belt!

Okay, so clearly this is a button for me.

I guess I just don't like Big Brother trying to control every little aspect of our lives. But I guess I am the minority.

Glad y'all love big brother. And that even while reading this entry you loved big brother so much you rationalized every controlling behavior it exhibits. "That's dangerous", "I have a right to know what I am eating" and "It's not a big hassle to use a car seat" are your thoughts, but you are wrong. You are a zombie, but just don't know it.